Don't really know what is happening to me?

For about a year and a half, I was in an abusive situation, where I felt anxiety, fear, sadness almost on a daily basis. Before that I was in a different abusive situation that was equally distressing...All three people in my family are abusive. I've always been the scapegoat in the family, and they've always kind of tried to prevent me from leaving. I finally left, with the hopes that my mom willl have a little bit of pity on me, and help me out while I start my life. However, she completely financially cut me off and even tried to get me back in contact with my abuser, so that I could ask him for money instead of her....While I used to feel really sad, and depressed, and emotional, I feel very numb now. Why am I feeling like this? Is it because of the abandonment, them just messing with my mind, the trauma, etc? Do I have PTSD or am I bipolar? One day I'm kind of up, having hope, being idealistic, and the next day I'm really down, being hopeless and suicidal? Thanks for any advice.